It's Chinatown, Jake

For those who don't get the Wooster Daily Record, this column ran on Sunday, March 15
____________________________________
Welcome to the China way of life
By PAUL WEINSTEIN
Guest Columnist

Ni hao. Greetings from Kaifeng, China, where I'm teaching at Henan University for a semester.

Jack Nicholson stands mute and befuddled, unable to fully grasp what has unfolded. "Forget it, Jake," advises his old partner. "It's Chinatown."

Here I am in the biggest Chinatown of 'em all. This is supposed to be the economic superpower that is rising as we are stumbling. Beijing airport's spanking new international terminal leads to a gleaming city center with new hotels overlooking broad boulevards filled with shiny autos. In America it feels like a "Made in China" label hangs on half the stuff we buy.

Kaifeng reminds me China is still a developing nation. Sure, there are automobiles on the streets but they are far outnumbered by a bewildering assortment of vehicles. The bicycles aren't the multi- speed hi-tech machines that even kids ride in America, but clunky unisex single-gear workhorses with a basket on the handlebars.

Electric motorbikes and motorcycles are a step up (why don't we have these?). You have to keep your eyes open because you can't hear when one sneaks up on you. Hordes of small three-wheeled vehicles from little taxis (bun-buns) to overloaded trucks roll down the roads.

There are bicycle rickshaws, carts, wagons and just about anything else that can move goods and carry people.

The Chinese ride in the open air even with temperatures in the 30s. The people seem oblivious to the cold. The buildings are perennially under-heated. On a February morning when a very light snow had fallen, the inadequate furnace in the corner of my classroom was not even running. The students sit in their parkas and sip hot tea out of thermoses without a murmur.

In restaurants there is barely any heat. On cold evenings customers eat with coats on. Drafts steadily blast through loose-fitting doors. Someone exits without closing. I can hear my mother asking about being born in a barn but the patrons hardly seem to notice until a server finally pulls it shut.

Proprietors of outdoor stands sell everything from eyeglass parts to hot snacks. They put in their endless days bundled up as thickly as Ralphie's little brother Randy in "A Christmas Story." I can't decide if the Chinese are tough, inured, or simply resigned. They are making me feel like a softy, especially on cool nights in my thermostat-free apartment (A great mystery here in the foreigner compound: Who controls the heat?). I sure am looking forward to the warmth of spring.

The downtown area is like the America I remember from the 1950s. Crowded sidewalks unroll past a thousand little stores. Recently I ambled by three shops dedicated solely to purses and another that was nothing but chopsticks.

Anyone who works in an organization knows that employees always complain about management. What are those office people thinking? In China the answer is quite easy: I have no idea. Last week there were rumors the freshmen would miss class for a service day.

One American teacher received a text informing him of the cancellation 30 minutes before class. I got the news off-handedly from a Chinese professor. At the University of Akron we'd receive a dozen e-mails reminding us of a cancellation. Here I guess people are just supposed to know these things.

Food in restaurants is great but comes out in no particular sequence. The Chinese way is to order a number of dishes and dig in as the cascade of food begins to appear. The beer is served somewhat cold and water is hot. That way you know it's clean. There's no written check, the total is just delivered verbally. Oh, and no tipping.

Allow me to note one last custom: Toddlers wear pants with a vertical split up the backside. No diapers needed, and the air conditioning might provide extra incentive to get potty trained.

China is so far away from America in space and spirit. It is a place where a simple walk down the street might bring a new surprise.

Forget what you've read or seen, you really have to dive in and swim to just begin to get acquainted.

It's Chinatown, Jake.